And now no more in love

Life is always unpredictable!

I think... I'm in love... pretty much...

Now I've figure it out

the only way of get out of the disappointment...

is so simple!

Just get a new target!

Why spend time on unworthy thought

while I can still...

manage to get something else!

Okay,

Its the end of the story

End the fantasy

End the excitement

End the blissful feeling

But

Hopefully the friendship is not ending...

I know i'm silly

I know i'm such a fool

for thinking about things

that i know i shouldn't be thinking about now

that i know it wouldn't be worth thinking

that i know it is almost impossible

that i know, it will only makes me feel even worse if im thinking about it

that i know, there's something else i should be paying attention

something else worth my attention

but what to do

i just can't control my stubborn brain...

i wish i can retract what i've said

i wish i have a time machine to bring me back so that i can make it up for myself

i wish i can just forget about it

i wish it just never happened

but perhaps, i should just accept it

as one of the experience in life?

Do not say you are in pain when you still can shout out loud

Because there's a pain, which you can't even shout...

Do not say you are sad when you can still cry

Because there's a sadness, which makes you can't even cry...

<3

If this is true,

I shall be grateful and blissful

because i can still shout for the pain

i can still cry when i'm sad

there's nothing so bad happened

everything will be fine soon

the god, will not guide us to a dead end

do not give up

even when there seems to be the end

because if we stay for a little longer

there will be a change towards the positive

and we shall thrive then

because it will only be the end or the worst,

only if we made it to be like that..

So always be grateful, no matter how bad things can be

because, it is not the worst...

I miss the time when there are people treating me so nicely,

But most of them leave me one by one

Am i not appreciating their presence?

Am i not treating them good enough as how they treated me?

Am i expecting too high?

Maybe its time to stop thinking...

The announcement recording in the exam hall is in British accent!

and i'm so enjoying it!

Maybe that is how you can relax in the exam hall

pay concentration to other things before you start

when there's the time to start answering

then ignore whatever happens around you

this is so funny, to be my comment for my very first exam in uni!

I'm done waiting

I'm really done

why on earth i'm the one who is waiting now

this is just nonsense

maybe sometimes i just can't follow my heart

but to follow my brain!

I hate it when people don't reply my message..

it makes me feel rejected...

some people said because im too sensitive

some said im having high pride

some said im just simply feeling insecure with people around me

whatever it is

its been years and still i can't get rid of this feeling..

Is it too much shopping during the holiday

I feel the pain in my ankle again

It doesn't feel right

But I still have to walk all way down to exam hall

God bless me and my poor ankle...

someone: do you write your blog everyday?

me: no, i only write when im not in good mood or emo-ing

someone: i suppose u write everyday then

me:............

Well, sometimes, having a shoulder for you to cry on,

having a hand to hold yours,

having someone who stay beside you during hard times,

it is just a simple happiness

now i agree with you, my friend.

you are right,

i should find one like you did..

What does it means when someone call you once in awhile to ask you how are you

What does it means when someone call you sometimes and pretend like he dialed the wrong number, just to speak to you and listen to your voice

What does it means when someone text you once in awhile just to see how are you doing

it is nice, when you know that someone is there for you, someone is always there when you feel lonely

do appreciate those people <3

Those who i want do not show passion..

Those who i don't want are showing their extreme passion..

What is this... =.=''

Household problem.. sigh...

What happens when your family member changes

What happens when an intruder of your family come in

What happens when you have to accept a new member into your family

Can you accept the new member without all your heart

Can you accept the new member including his flaws and goods just like how you accept your true family member

Take it as you don't have a choice but to accept

Make changes in your life

Because life is never static

When its time to change, you have to compromise

yes, i have to compromise

i have to accept new changes, open to all possibilities

i shall not cling to the old ones

i can do it...

When you grow up, your world gets more and more complicated..

And you yourselves get more and more complicated

I wish i am a small girl back then

I wish i can say i hate u, i don't like you, i like you, i love you, just like what a kid can do

but i can't, because i'm no longer a kid

because people around me will not do that anymore

people keep their words in their heart

or say it in another way round

and so there's one word i learned when i gradually grow up..

"backstabbing"

and i think that's the vocabulary i hate the most, and yet happens a lot

i wish i am a small girl back then,

but is my childhood happy?

mama said i wasn't pretty much a happy kid

the moment i was born, the first minute i came to this world,

i cried, the way like i'm unsatisfied with everything

like i'm not happy to come to this world

but i guess with the love my family give me all the time, i changed

i'm happy most of the time

mommy is still always worried for me

because she thinks that i've always view things negatively,

so i forced myself to only think the bright side of everything

i forced myself not to think about bad things

i forced myself to do thing despite i feel that im deceiving myself

but so what

they make me do this for my own good

so im doing it for my own good

so growing up, im much more than a happy girl

i dont wanna go back because my life back then is not a happy life

i endured my primary school life with tears all the time

until the turning point of my life come when i moved, when i leave the evil place with evil kids

and i dont wanna go back because i'm not happy with the year before

and i dont wanna go back because my life now is more satisfying

so for all these reasons, i dont wanna go back

i will stay here and bear with this complicated world, with my self becoming more and more complicated

and deal with tis complicated world

with the changes i've made in order to survive

life will be the way like how you view it, how u wanna shape it, how u want it to be

so, i will shape my life, i will get what i want, i will make myself satisfied

to prove that i'm not the unhappy, unsatisfied baby like i was

with anything cost it, i will get them no matter how

because this is how we survive in this real world

an angel will not be able to survive here

but the mixture of angel and demon will.

close my eyes,

listen to the songs,

their background music,

their melody,

feel it by my heart,

that's so awesome...

thats the power of music.. <3

I don't know why, but you lied to me

and it hurts

i don't mind listening to cruel truth

so don't lie to me

thank you for your kindness

I don't know why on earth there is a people like that
Why keep bugging me
Why being so rude
Why do you sounds nice sometimes, somehow
And at the next minute, you are rude again
is that your nature for being a weirdo
i hate you
i wanna slap u on the face sometimes
but sometimes i feel sorry for you
you sounds lonely, you sounds lost, you sounds like you don't have friend with you
so i stayed with you, because i take you as my friend
but you can't just give vent to your anger like that, to me
I sincerely, from deep inside of my heart hope that you will grow up one day,
you will know how to control your emotion
you will know how to appreciate your friend
so that your life will not be so lonely
perhaps one day you don't need me as a comfort ( which i felt that way )
but if its because you have found your true soul mate in your life,
I will be very glad
because, your are my friend...
but now, at the minute i feel like slapping you for being so rude, so harsh
at the next minute, you apologise
you are so very the troublesome ><

This is a touching one

Nothing special, nothing exaggerating, just simply an old man missing his deceased wife, and yet it is so heart breaking.. <3

Plus the nice song..

Oh my friend, why send this to me, u are making me cry! =/

OMG,
I lied but i don't feel THAT bad..
i hate myself =/

A times I turn around and look back,
then i started to think
why am i here
what am i doing here
is this really what i want
do i really want this
why am i working so hard to get all those i have now
is this the life that i want
do i want a normal but happy life
or i wanna do something special
am i really happy
am i satisfied with my life already
what am i gonna be
.......
.........
...........
all these are the toughest question, and till now, i can't get the answer, the true answer.

Jane Lament

Follow the sun, my beloved one
Follow the sun, your flight has begun,

Follow the sun, my beloved one
Follow the sun, your flight has begun

One day we will sleep together again,

But till then,

Farewell,
Farewell,

Sweet Angel.

Maybe its time to grow up,
Maybe its time to think about it,
Maybe its time for me not to run away from that
Maybe its time for me to focus
Yes,
its time,
Believe it or not
This is life
Life is not hard but challenging
Life is not tough but making u tough
I shouldn't stay being a kid's mind, therefore
ok, now i'm crapping again,
thats the thing when u are constantly alone, and being forced to study =/

I will learn to stand on my own feet now,
I promise I will
Since you are leaving me
I will learn to grow up and live without you
Without the shadow of yours always by my side
=)

I've decided to be a kind girl
a very very kind girl
because i met one
and she touched my heart
deep inside
omg... my mood swing

If falling in love eventually means getting hurt sooner or later, why should we fall in love.
Why not let the first love also be the last and forever love.
Why let the greed and unsatisfying heart conquer love.
Why hold people back
Why make it so complicated
Why not taking it sincerely with all your humble heart
Why can't it stop being hurting
Why can't it stop giving us illusions and day dreams
Why...
Its deemed to be like that, then i shall not fall in love anymore
Love should be a shield not a sword (gosh the effect of studying contract)